Academic Failure and Hitting Rock Bottom

i was like oh god an escalade it's my new work truck like you're gonna drive to school like okay he said cause it's big safe and slow so there was that but anyway i get my iron big block heads out of this shelby and the guy comes walking out and he's like what are you doing messing with these old things and you got this thing to drive around and i was just like i didn't have an answer for him i was just like oh i don't know i like it it's not mine like i didn't it was about the the quest for me it wasn't just having the fast car it was like i wanted to build it that forward growth in that topic is what gave me like life i don't know that sounds cheesy but you know what i'm talking about when you're passionate about something you're all in it you're just in it and everything is just going and then it's not you're not thinking about it you're just fully absorbed in that and that's how i was with that stuff so i just kept fueling that fire regardless of whatever else was going on and over time i made friends just because you know you do things you make smarter friends you meet more people you ask good questions i always want to learn everything so i learned stuff from anybody that would tell me anything and over time i just kept making new new friends doing more stuff and knew like i wanted to put a cam in something and i'm like okay well we're gonna go to the track and i'm gonna talk people who got cams and their stuff and i'm just gonna see like how they do that and that's that's all it was i wasn't even allowed to drag race i don't know if i've ever said that anywhere before my dad was like oh you can't go to the track because if your crush isn't all covered under insurance and oblivious i'm like okay i'll never go there and my sister ratted me out one time my dad freaked out and i told him that she misunderstood what i said and whatever but i was actually racing i raced the escalade as a 14 second truck for a whole summer secretly never posted anything anywhere i couldn't tell anybody what i was doing other than the friends i was there with because if i got back to my dad he'd beat my ass and that was that was my life back then i don't know a lot of people don't know that it's it's strange so when i think about all the weird stuff i do now like you know sleeping in the back seat of my truck at truck stops and i live in a freaking rv in an industrial park in dallas texas cool that sounds miserable to a lot of people you want your yard and your white picket…